Finally, Something Worthy to Put in a Blog

Climbing the stairs to the third floor to my apartment, I saw my Chinese roommate standing in the middle of the staircase and speaking excitedly in Chinese on his cell phone.

My roommate's English boils down to 4 words which he has impossible time pronouncing - working (which sounds like uking), chicken (ziken), fish (he gets this one right) and boyfriend (pretty good too). Sometimes when English words don't come to mind, he mixes it up with Spanish - "mucho ungli?" is a common question I get from him when he sees me microwaving something. He is a friendly guy in his early-mid 50's. For the number of words he knows he's extremely talkative, and he always seems in a good mood. Unlike my other 3 Chinese roommates, whose English is proficient, but who choose to ignore me and not even say hello when I run into them in the corridor.

So the Chinese roommate starts gesturing frantically at me and points toward the apartment door. I get to the door, and I try to pull my tired brain together and understand what the excitement is all about. I pretty much stare blankly at him, while he frustratedly points towards his room and my other roommate's room. What is it?-I'm thinking. And then it dawns on me. Both rooms' doors are wide open, and everything inside is upside down. We've been robbed.

I run to my room and the first thing to do is check if my folder with passport and paperwork is still intact...nothing is missing. My roommate follows me to my room and makes a face at the mess. "God damned" - is the only thing I can think to say. "Moni?" roommate asks. No, the only money in my room is a jar of coins which is still there minus the coins – the only thing missing.

What the roommate doesn't know is that my room in its current messiness is pretty much the way I left it when I went to work this morning. I am and always been a pig. Leaving clothes, empty dishes and papers all over the floor - to the point where I can't make my way across the room. I can imagine the look on the burglars' faces when they opened the door. The burglars didn't even have to force the door, my lock is so easy to pick. Once inside they probably thought somebody beat them to the job - the only thing in sight is trash covering the floor, old mattress, an even older (but very faithful) desktop, ordinary TV, and a closet full of shabby clothes. Actually my room is so ragged, they didn't even try very hard to search and they missed a little box with some jewelry my mom had given me. Apparently being a pig could prove useful in situations like this.

Roommate has already called the landlord and the cops, so we wait. Cops are not too long. Two of them in their early 30's - one funnily resembles Raymond's brother from "Everybody Loves Raymond". Cops look at me like I'm a ghost. One of them finally asks - "You don't mind me asking. So you live here? Because you don't exactly fit the profile of the building." And if by profile he means - Chinese or Hispanic. Does he suspect me of anything? - I thought. So I defensively went into a lengthily explanation how I live in this room for 2 1/2 years now, and how I found it on Craigslist, and how I just sleep here and it's very cheap. The cop seemed satisfied.

The whole time this is happening, my Chinese roommate is listening to us, and I know he doesn't understand a word we say because he has this worried/confused look on his face.

The cop asked if anything is missing, and filled in a robbery report with our information. Soon, 3 more cops showed up, one of them Chinese so he could translate to my roommate. It turns out, another robbery happened yesterday 2 blocks from here. So the cop explains that they will most surely catch the robber, if he/she continues the robbing.

The fist set of cops left, I'm watching TV, and eating McDonald's salad, and waiting for the second set of cops to come and take fingerprints of the place. The good thing is that I shouldn't clean my room in case they have to take fingerprints. I can hear the roommates out in the corridor talking loudly in Chinese.